Shore Up Your Sagging Middle

Writing is a lot like building a bridge. Each scene serves as scaffolding or supports for your entire story to rest on without sagging.

Maybe you’ve made a great start. You have a dynamite hook (some of my favorites: “The last camel collapsed at noon.” Ken Follet, and “The man with ten minutes to live was laughing.” Frederick Forsyth). You’ve gotten off to a good strong start. Maybe you know how your book is going to end, and even have the final scene written.
Now, how do you get through the middle part without it sagging and possibly collapsing?

First of all, you don’t need to write chronologically. You can write scenes out of order. Pick out some highlights and write those scenes, then see if you can figure out what you might be able to fill in between A and G.

Now, send your inner “nice guy” out for ice cream and figure out just how mean you can be to your character. Conflict is the key to keeping a story moving, to shoring it up. You’ve introduced your character and the problem she has to solve. You know what the goal is at the end.

Let’s say Cathy Character wants to be the first teenage girl to climb Mount Huge. What are her obstacles? Her parents are against the idea. It’s too expensive, too dangerous, she’s not in shape, who else is going, etc. Cathy has to overcome each objection, solve each problem.

Maybe her neighbor is a banker, so she approaches him for a loan. If he smiles and says,” Sure, Cathy, anything for you,” the problem is solved too quickly. The story can get boring and the reader’s interest will sag quickly.

But what if he says no? Now Cathy has to figure out another way to raise money. What should she do – a bake sale, a part-time job, rob the local drive-in? (You can see the various paths this story could take.) There are all kinds of ideas and none of them should be easy.

Every time your character figures out a way over, around or through a problem, throw up another obstacle, within reason, of course. You don’t want her to fail at everything.

But when she solves the money part of the problem, there should be another one waiting. Who, besides her parents, are going to oppose her? Does she have a rival? Or is there a friend who is supposedly helping her, but is actually sabotaging Cathy’s efforts?

Building a story is like constructing a bridge. You need conflict as the pillars that shore up the middle.

For each scene you write, ask yourself:
• What is the purpose of this scene?
• Does it move the story forward? (What if I take it out? Does the story flow well without it?)
• Can the reader identify with the character’s problem and struggles?
• Have you created suspense? (Will the reader want to keep reading to find out how your character solves this one? What’s at stake for him/her?)
Have fun being mean to your character and building your bridge!




A native Montanan, Heidi M. Thomas now lives in Northwest Washington. Her first novel, Cowgirl Dreams, is based on her grandmother, and the sequel, Follow the Dream, has recently been released. Heidi has a degree in journalism, a certificate in fiction writing, and is a member of Northwest Independent Editors Guild and Pacific Northwest Writers Association. She teaches writing and edits, blogs, and is working on the next books in her “Dare to Dream” series. Please visit her website and blog at http://www.heidimthomas.com

Personality Tests for Character Development?

Character development has always been difficult.  If readers cannot fall in love with, feel empathy for, identify with or, on the other hand, hate, be repulsed by, or fear your characters there is little investment for finishing your work. Who couldn’t identify with Harry, Ron and Hermione? I the strength of their personalities that attract readers young and old, male and female, from all socioeconomic groups and all ethnicities. 

One of the best tools for creating interesting, believable and multi dimensional characters is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI).  Taking the time to learn how to effectively use this tool can be invaluable. 

Do you want your character to have an “out there” personality or one that is more introspective and reserved?  Do you want him to be an idea man or the realistic, this is the way it is kind of guy?  Is your heroine the strong, no nonsense, take charge type like J. D. Robb’s character Eve Dallas or more stereotypical female?  Do you want a character that is goal oriented, time sensitive and orderly or more fly by the seat of the pants, flexible and spontaneous? 

When you have an understanding of personality type and how it influences everything from how a person socializes to how she makes decisions, the possibilities for creating believable, intriguing characters that readers want to get to know are endless.

So check out www.capt.org, or www.personalitypage.com, contact a local mental health professional, or go to the library. 

First learn about yourself, then apply that knowledge to your characters.   

Good Luck!

By: Dr. Anita Tieman

Dr. Tieman worked with Martha Swirzinski to write 3 children's books. 

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Are You a Pantser?

You're a pantser if you use seat of the pants story telling, or writing without benefit of an outline. The real question is whether this is a good trait, or whether you should immediately abandon the practice.

There are two schools of thought on the issue. On one side you have Chris Baty's No Plot, No Problem. This philosophy drives the concept of Nanowrimo with it's thousands of writers working to finish a novel each November. Stephen King in On Writing suggests something similar. If you have a great idea, just start writing and see where it takes you. One could argue that much of what happens in Nanowrimo, while good for the individual isn't publishable. However, no once can argue that King isn't a great story teller.

The other side of the argument states that you're basically wasting your time if you don't structure your story and use at least a rudimentary outline. Larry Brooks in Story Engineering states that you need to structure your story in a series of plot points, basically conforming to the quarters of the story, so that you continually draw the reader forward. This is essentially the format used in screen writing.

So what's right. Recognizing that few of us can compete with Stephen King, should we outline before we write? Personally, I think a writer should use whatever method makes him or her comfortable. I can see drawbacks with either mode. If you're a pantser, you may end up rewriting to make your story conform to a plot line. On the other hand, if you plot too tight, you may miss character interactions that would make your story special.

So what's the advice? If you have a good feel for story arc (and Stephen King is apparently one of those writers.) you may do your best work by having the idea and letting your characters tell the story. If you find yourself muddled about a third of the way through the story, not sure of where to go, I'd suggest outlining and trying to fit your story to major plot points.

Whatever kind of writer you are pantser, outliner, or a combination, keep writing. You will find the mode that's most comfortable for you and find that what you write is salable.


Nancy Famolari
Website: http://sites.google.com/site/nancyfamolari/Winner's Circle available from Amazon.com 

Internal and External Conflict

By Stephen Tremp

"The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph” - Thomas Paine

Authors love to incorporate conflict not only into their stories, but into the very fabric of their characters. It is conflict that drives the plot forward and engages the reader. The more adverse the conflict is, or a state of opposition, the more rewarding the victory is to the overcomers.

According to Gillian Roberts in You Can Write A Mystery, the fundamental element of all drama is conflict, a clash between good an evil. Life vs. death. Law vs. disorder. There are internal and external conflicts and personality conflicts with people of different goals, hostile witnesses, uncooperative employees, or frustrating red tape. Murder is often the “crime of choice” as it is the ultimate offense and “therefore produces the most absolute and unequivocal conflicts.” But conflict can manifest in numerous other less-violent forms, as long as it wrongs the accepted norms of a society or individuals. Gillain suggests the two sides of conflict be equally weighted (easier said than done). The protagonist should be the mental equal of the antagonist. Otherwise, it’s an unfair fight or a rout rather than a difficult quest and the tension would be reduced.

Internal conflict, or the conflict that takes place within the mind if a character, and external conflict, the struggle against some outside force, can be deciding factors as to what separates a good story from a great story. The protagonist has to meet a challenge and conquer it. But it’s hard if not seemingly impossible. He’s repeatedly foiled time and again along his journey, but must press forward. There is also conflict between individuals and their interactions, whether they are friend or foe. Characters can have differing goals. There can be hostile witnesses or frustrating beaurocracy and red tape.

Conflict also offers the author the opportunity to weave into the plot twists and turns that will keep the reader up late at night, turning the pages. When the protagonist, antagonist, or other characters overcome a seemingly insurmountable obstacle, the author can take advantage of the opportunity to bamboozle the reader by shifting the plot and make an unexpected sharp left or right turn.

Utilitarianism, or conduct directed toward promoting the greatest good for the greatest number of people, provides an excellent opportunity for an author to implement the element of internal and eternal conflict. Throughout history, men and women in positions of authority, during exceedingly excruciating circumstances, have had to make utilitarian decisions that affect countless lives and history itself. During World War II, Allied decision makers had to sacrifice entire towns and cities in order to take one more step toward winning the war. Dropping nuclear bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki in order to save literally millions of American and Japanese casualties would be another extreme example.

In my book Breakthrough, Chase Manhattan’s utilitarian decisions may seem to be on a much smaller scale. However, as the Breakthrough trilogy progresses, we see a Pandora’s Box that is opened and the key is the discovery of wormholes. Indeed, a seemingly innocent breakthrough that can benefit mankind can instead threaten life as we know it and send us back to the dark ages. The protagonist must overcome his own internal and external conflict if he is to stop the madness and destroy this breakthrough discovery.

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Writing the Blues

by Margaret Fieland

I've been a fan of the blues, the musical genre for years. But there's a lot I don't know about the it, as I found out when I took a quick peek online in Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blues. That hasn't stopped me from writing a series of poems I've labeled blues. They're rhymed, rhythmic, and, well, see for yourself.

The first one I'm sharing is called Street Corner Blues. I'm a native New Yorker, born and raised in Manhattan. When I was in my 20s, the first apartment I rented without a roommate was on third avenue south of Fourteenth street, just above the East Village. Hookers, prostitutes, junkies, and drug dealers hung out on the corner. Local law enforcement had their hands full, and often, as far as I could tell, looked the other way.

One day last summer I was in down town Osterville, a very upscale town on Cape Cod, when I spied a couple of young men, underwear clearly visible above their low hanging pants, hanging around on a corner, and I flashed on the story in this poem. Who knows what the pair were actually doing – probably nothing more sinister than waiting for their mother to finish her shopping.

Street Corner Blues

Waiting on cracked sidewalk,
want to cadge a ride,
my ears catch rough, tough talk,
full of macho pride.

Two, three  brothers talking.
One guy pulls his gun.
I  start out slowly walking,
turn around, then run.

Hear three shots behind me,
next a sudden scream.
I’m done for if they find me,
knowing everything I seen.

Sitting on my sofa,
someone’s at my door,
pounding, kicks it open.
Don’t remember nothing more.

Cops come by to see me
in my hospital bed.
say, “Talk, man, or he goes free.”
But if I do, I’m dead.

Don’t remember nothing,
ain’t seen nobody fight.
I ain’t heard no gunshots
ringing through dark night.

This next poem has at its heart a true incident. I used to study ballet, and continued into my 20's. One night in class, I stepped wrong when making a pique turn, and twisted my knee. Not realizing how bad it was, I took the subway home, and by the time I hobbled up the subway stairs onto 14th street, I could barely walk. One of the many junkies hanging out offered to help me home. This man made polite conversation about the merits of Tae Kwan Do, and what he thought of Chuck Norris (a good friend was a martial arts devotee) all the way back to my apartment building. I have never forgotten this stranger's kindness to me.

The Help Me, Someone, Blues

I slip, slide on a banana,
a sudden fall. I twist my knee,
grab the lamp post, pull to standing,
no one spares a glance at me.
Not one single person's stopping,
but, hey, it's New York City.
I'm calling out the help me, someone, blues.

My knee's twisted, my knee's throbbing,
and I'm in a lot of pain.
I don't know what is going on
but something's wrong, it's plain.
I pick up the darn banana,
and I toss it down the drain.
I'm still hoping for the help me, someone, blues.

I take a few steps, slowly
limp and stumble down the street.
My whole left leg is ballooning.
I sit down on the concrete.
No way I can stagger home.
I must admit defeat.
I'm yelling out the help me, someone, blues.

I spot someone approaching,
had a bit too much to drink.
From five feet away the liquor
oozes off him. What a stink.
He comes right over to me,
says, "You need a hand, I think.
You're calling out the help me, someone, blues."

He loops my arm around his shoulder,
walks me right up to my door.
Murmurs, "Maam, it's been my pleasure,
not in any way a chore."
His head's stuck in a bottle,
but he was my savior,
the answer to the help me, someone, blues.

And here's one final poem, inspired by a quick dash down the stairs to the T in Boston one rainy night.

A Token for the Train

I clatter down the stairway,
buy a token for the train,
have no special destination,
seeking shelter from the rain.
Then I'm standing on the platform,
wondering why I'm here again.

In the station, sudden darkness,
hear the rattle of the train.
People screaming on the platform
echoes, drumming in my brain.
We can't see where we're going,
I turn round and round again.

I wonder why this havoc's happening,
wonder how we're getting out.
We're stumbling, bumbling in this darkness
turning, churning round about.
Someone's fallen on the train tracks,
all around folks scream and shout.

There's a whistle in the tunnel
and the clacking of the train,
then the screech and scream of metal
that's protesting from its pain,
squeals and squeaks of brakes engaging
as they work to stop the train.

I hear footsteps running over,
someone's jumping to the track,
followed by their grunts and groaning
as they pull the jumper back,
feel some thumping on platform.
My head's spinning, things go black.

Someone helps me back to standing
as the lights are coming on,
train doors close, it leaves the station.
Now the crowds of folks have gone.
I figure I'd be better walking
after all that has gone wrong.

Visit my website and blog
http://www.margaretfieland.com/

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How to Write a Press Release

If you're promoting a newsletter, book or even yourself, a good press release is an essential tool. A well constructed press release can get your name out quickly.

1. A good release should get you exposure on the community calendar or the FYI sidebar in newsprint.

2. It should get you a response by phone or by email. Often the newspaper, radio station or website will contact you for clarification or sometimes an interview.

3. Your release should be ready to print. If you do the work for them, they are more likely to use it in print. They can just plug it in and go. That saves them time and money.

Things to include:

For immediate release or the start date
Your Phone and email address
Several spaces below that: THE TITLE IN ALL CAPS
You need to keep it brief, but eye catching!

Example: LOCAL SCRIBE SIGNS WITH NATIONAL PUBLISHER

Subtitle in upper and lower case:

Example: Mount Airy Author Reads at the Cornelia Library

Put the WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN in the first paragraph in an exciting and refreshing way.

Boring: Kathy Stemke will be reading her book at the Cornelia Library on Thursday, August 4, 2011.

Creative way to give the same information: Story telling is a lost art. Children learn about relationships, their community and how things work through stories. Retired teacher and author, Kathy Stemke, showcases her craft Thursday, August 4th at the Cornelia Library.

The rest of the release should show why people should attend and why they should be interested in Kathy Stemke.

Example: Kathy Stemke has a B.S. from Southern Connecticut State University and Covenant Life Seminary, as well as graduate coursework from New York Institute of Technology and Columbia University. Hanging her hat in the North Georgia mountains, she has been a dancer, choreographer, teacher, tutor, writer and antiques dealer for many years. As a freelance writer and ghostwriter, Kathy has published hundreds of articles in directories, websites and magazines. She is a reviewer for Sylvan Dell Publishing. As a retired teacher, Kathy has several activities published with Gryphon House Publishing.

Kathy’s first e-book, Moving Through All Seven Days, is now available on Lulu. Trouble on Earth Day, a picture book about recycling and Sh Sh Sh Let the baby Sleep a picture book that deals with sibling relationships and consonant blends are also available.

The closing of your press release should be specifically about who the release represents. If it represents the library, you want to give the specific address and phone information so people can contact them with questions. If the release is from Kathy Stemke, she should add a phone number, email address and website address.

Example: For more information contact Ms. Stemke at 678 234-5151, or dancekam1@yahoo.com. You can sign up for Kathy’s free monthly newsletter, Movement and Rhythm, on her blog: http://educationtipster.blogspot.com

Keep it to one page! Just remember, if they want more, they will ask for it. Fill the space at the bottom of the page with contact numbers. Edit well and submit a clean copy.

A picture is worth a thousand words. Every medium loves photos. If you are submitting a photo please identify everyone in it, left to right, front row, back row. You must have photo releases available. If you submit a photo by email, make sure it is very high resolution. If you submit a snapshot by mail, make sure it is not your one and only copy, because with some newsrooms you will never see it again.

Better still, offer the paper a photo opportunity - you with your award, you accepting your award, or you signing your books for your fans.

If you have published a new book, suggest a giveaway--a write-in competition with a couple of copies of your book as prizes.

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Self-Editing: 10 Tips Checklist for Children’s Writers

You’ve been working on your story for a while now and you think it’s just about done. It’s been critiqued numerous times and you revised it numerous times. Now, it’s time to proofread and self-edit. You don’t want to short-change yourself on the last stretch, so get ready to put the final layers of polish on your manuscript.

Here are 10 tips to you can use to help fine-tune your children’s manuscript:

1. Check for clarity

Check each sentence for clarity. It’s important to remember that you may know what you intend to convey, but your readers may not. It’d be a good idea to have someone else read the manuscript for you. This is where a good critique group comes in handy.

2. Check for “telling” and lackluster sentences

Check each sentence for telling. While you will need some effective telling, you want to have more showing.

Example: Joe hit his head and was dazed.
Alternative: Joe banged his head against the tree. He wobbled a moment and fell to the ground.

Show, don’t tell. Use your imagination and picture your character going through motions—maybe he’s turning his lip up, or he’s cocking his head. Try to visualize it; this will help in showing rather than telling.

A good way to add more showing is to add more sensory details. Use the five senses (sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste) to create a living character; this will help breathe life into your story.

Example: Joe felt cold.
Alternative: A chill ran through Joe’s body.

Example: Joe was frightened.
Alternative: Joe’s breath stopped. Goosebumps made the hair on his arms stand at attention.

3. Point of View: Watch for head hopping
Checking for head hopping is especially important for children’s writers since their stories should be told from the protagonist’s point of view or perspective.

If the story is being told from your main character’s point of view (POV) make sure it stays there.

If my POV character Joe is sad and wearing a frown, it wouldn’t be advisable to say: Noticing his sad face Fran immediately knew Joe was distraught. This is bringing Fran’s POV into the picture.

You might say: Joe knew Fran would immediately notice his despair; they were friends for so long.

 Or, you can just use dialogue: “Joe, what’s wrong?”

4. Watch for story consistency, conflict, clarity, and flow

Checking for consistency, conflict, clarity, and flow is another must for all writers of fiction. If you’re a children’s writer it’s even more important. Children need a structured story that’s consistent. The story also needs to provide conflict and action to keep the child engaged, along with clarity to help with comprehension. It should also flow smoothly with one paragraph, chapter moving seamlessly into the next.

5. Use spell-check

Make sure you write with spell-check on or use your word processor’s spell-check when you’re finished with your manuscript. I like writing with it on.

Just be careful here because while spell-check will catch misspelled words it won’t catch words that are spelled correct, but are the incorrect word in regard to meaning.

Example: He was to tired.
Correct: He was too tired.

These words are called homonyms and spell-check will not catch them.

A homonym is a word that sounds like another word, but is spelled different and has a different meaning. Examples of homonyms are: hare/here/hair; bare/bear/; stationary/stationery; peek/peak; principle/principal; capital/capitol; compliments/complements; cite/site/sight.

6. Use your Find function on your word processor

This is a great tool to check for “ly” words, “ing” words, weak verbs, and over used words such as “was.”

7. Watch for redundancy

Check the story for repeated phrasing and even paragraph beginnings. You don’t want several paragraphs in a row beginning with “the” or other repetitive wording. When editing your manuscript use the Find function in your word program and look for overused words.

Another aspect of redundancy is using unnecessary words.

Example: Sit down on the chair.
The word ‘down’ is redundant; ‘sit’ implies down.

Example: She whispered quietly.
The word ‘quiety’ is redundant.

8. Check for tight writing

In today’s market, tight writing is important—readers have a shorter attention span. So, get rid of unnecessary words and text.

Example: Joe had a really hard time lifting the very heavy and big trunk.
Alternative: Joe struggled to lift the huge trunk.

Also, watch for words such as “began” and “started.”

Example: He began to lift the trunk.
Alternative: He lifted the trunk.

9. Check for punctuation and grammar

There are a number of great books and even online articles that will help you learn proper punctuation and grammar. Two books that I use are: The Frugal Editor by Carolyn Howard Johnson and The Great Grammar Book by Marsha Sramek.

You can also do a Google search.

10. Children’s writers: Take illustrations into account

When writing a picture book you need to allow for illustrations. Picture books are a marriage between content and illustrations—a 50/50 deal. So, watch for text that an illustration can handle. With picture books your content doesn’t have to describe every little detail—the illustrations will embellish the story.

Well, this completes the 10 tips, but please know that self-editing is a tricky business and this is not an all inclusive list. Even knowing all the obstacles to watch out for, self-editing is still tricky. It's almost impossible for us writers to catch all our own errors; we're much too close to our work. We know every nook and cranny of the story and that makes it difficult to read it in a fresh manner. Even if we think we're reading every word, our mind is way ahead of us, that's why it's advisable to look into hiring an editor.

Karen Cioffi is a children's ghostwriter and rewriter. Have a children's book manuscript, outline, or idea? Check out: Writing for Children.







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